Science-based Cooking and Seasons

Science-based Cooking

It's hard for the average cook to grasp the idea of food chemistry or looking at the molecular level of food because recipes are not setup that way.  Recipes are designed with ingredients, and ingredients are proportions, or ratios, of components that make up the dish. But within each component are even more components, or new ratios. These come in the form of proteins, lipids, carbohydrates, and other minerals and vitamins   Each of these components and their interaction, give ingredients different properties - properties that contribute to texture, taste, and smell.  For example, cookie dough as a set of ingredients, minus the liquid, is flour, sugar, and butter. Each of these ingredients can further be broken down as a protein, carbohydrate, and lipid, respectively.  And these categorical elements can be further broken down into their individual constituents.  Take the protein in flour for example, which has a large molecule, and the driving force in breads, gluten.  Gluten, as a large chain of proteins, can be further broken down as a set of gliadin and glutenin.  Each of these play major roles in the properties of baked goods. Gliadin allows the dough to stretch (and rise) while glutenin springs it back into place. Now at this level, towards the bottom of the rabbit hole, we can learn the magic behind the mystery.  We might never know why our fish died when we were young or why we have a strange fixation towards midget porn, but we can know why our food behaves the way it does.  And we can start to micro-manage its flavor-soldiers so they are more prepared for their next battle into Mordor (the oven).


Seasons


I'm seasonal with seasons. Spring brings joy, summer brings more joy, fall makes me a goddamn poet, and winter just pisses me off.  I vote, we just kind of get rid of winter.  It's a horrible time of the year.  It's cold, it raises my bills, and my dick is constantly smaller than normal.  Seriously, winter only has two perks: More hot chocolate and less stinky people.  I'm so excited it's ending and my good ol' friend, Mr. Sun, is poppin his face back into my life.  The smell of sunscreen, chicks in bikinis, a bigger dick, and all the vitamin D I need. I'm ready for a change. I'm ready to sit outside with a beer and eat lot of ice cream.  I'm ready to hike and climb a fucking mountain just to prove to Mother Nature that I'm not her bitch.  I'm done pouring my thoughts into whiskey, and ready to take an outdoor challenge and flex my arms in front of bear.

Summer Camps and Cyclic Love

Summer Camps
I never went to a summer camp.  I remember begging my parents to let me go, but they would not hear anything of it.  Maybe it got in the way of our family vacations, or maybe it got in the way of yard work my dad had planned for me.  Anyways, I feel like I missed out on a lot of adolescent development. Yes, I agree there is a natural course for things to work themselves out, but a catalyst would have always been welcomed. Even if it was an atomic wedgie or getting tea-bagged by the counselor. Maturity comes in many forms, from second base with Becky to victoriously climbing the tallest tree, then falling out and breaking your arm.  It comes with pain, embarrassment and glory.  Camp offers a healthy dose of all these things.

Anyways, I'm currently working on a new script with a friend and it's about summer camps. Since I've never gone to one, I've had to research. Watching movies, playing pranks on co-workers, and referencing vocabulary that just doesn't register for the average adult.  It's been a fun trip, and I'm still enjoying it.  For a preview, I've added a short description of two of the many characters I'm currently shaping.  Also if you have any good camp stories, please post them!!

Maggie:
She's 12 years old and idolizes her older sister.  She watches her everyday, jealous of her stage 4 areolas and punk rock shirts.  She's a rebel at heart too.  She wants to meet people outside her boring town; cool people just like her sister.  She finds out about summer camps. Here's a place she can fit right in with the older girls without her sister standing in the way. She'll mature, and learn all the Ins and Outs of boys and their ways.  Camp starts, but not everything goes according to plan.  She tie-dies things when she gets upset.

Simon:
Simon is your typical nerdy guy.  Fluent in obscure alien languages and pre-cuts his underwear before heading to school.  He finds out about a camp outside of town where he might have a chance to be cool.  He signs up, starts working out, and gets immediately ridiculed the first day of camp.  His best friend gets taken under the wing of one of the jock and becomes a bully. Simon learns a lot about himself, even gets some action.  His big comeback involves challenging the biggest jock to a game of ping-pong, one game that nerds can succeed.


Cyclic Love
It all started with a kid's game.  That game where you pick up a beautiful flower and remove the pedals merrily chanting "They love me, they love me not".  Slowly, one pedal at a time, the flower is transformed into a useless weed, lost of desire and enchantment. It was at the early age of eight or so we started preparing ourselves for a vicious cycle we did not quite understand.  How everything starts with a bang and ends with a crash.  A type of cyclic love, flower to flower.  It begins with something great, several weeks of excitement and getting to know each other.  This is very similar to the blooming of a flower in the Spring.  Then something happens, you either settle, and plant your roots, or start looking for faults.  And one by one, contemplating love and hate,  you pluck away until you have no beauty left. "They love me, they love me not".

Summer and Spain

Hey.

It's been a great summer so far.  I've been enjoying the sunshine while it's here and taking lunches to bike ride and evenings to garden.  That right, the sun is up and my garden is reproducing.  So far I've plucked three squashes, one cucumber, and one zucchini.  There is also a shit load of tomatoes about to turn red, just waiting for those suckers.  And like always, with happiness comes a tear, my pepper plants are dying.  I don't know what to do with them.  I water them, I care for them, and even sometimes sing outside, but they just won't grow up.  Little stubborn punks.


Lately, I've been obsessed with Spain.

Been reading up on it's culture, some of its history, but mostly its cooking.  A good Spanish dish is an amazing and simple creation.  It lives without too much complication or spices unlike it westbound neighbor Portugal.  I've only reached the middle of the country, by the Castiles and the oh-so-well-know La Mancha, home of the Don Quixote.  It's been a pleasant trip, and enjoying it in Arkansas allows me to not endure the noxious weather luring in its homeland.  You see, while we enjoy a nice well-rounded four seasons, Spain sits through a nine month winter and a hell-like three month summer.  The lands of Castile, both north and south, are also surrounded by large mountain ranges and many meagre, almost baron communities, unlike its famous Madrid.  Madrid is the screwball virgin in the whore house.  (Not really sure why I used that analogy; maybe it's the fact that I've been watching a lot of Game of Thones where whore houses are very popular). Anyways, the crossroads of Madrid is a cultural gangbang of culinary pleasures.  A fancy hotdog.  Ok Bob, enough with the comparisons.  For the rest of central Spain, food is not about eccentric plating or something to talk about, it's about keeping the common warm through the harsh winter or cooling him during the summertime. It's about a nascent tomorrow, making dreams for it and pursuing them again and again because you are alive and can do it.  Here's a little taste of that realization with soup.

Sopa de Ajo (Spicy Garlic Soup)
Ingredients:
1/4 cup of olive oil
1 1/2 tbs of chopped garlic
1 1/2 cup of coarsely crumbled bread
1/2 tsp of paprika
3 cups of water
1/2 tsp of salt
1/8 tsp of cayenne
1 egg, beaten (or not)

Instructions:
Get a small sauce pan, add olive oil, and warm it up on the stove on medium low heat.  After a couple of minutes, add garlic and cook until it starts turning a light brown in color.  Next add bread crumbs and mix with wooden spoon.  (You don't have to mix with a wooden spoon, but it does feel more authentic).  Make sure you don't burn the bread, constantly play with it.  Once it looks toasty, add paprika and mix it with the breadcrumbs.  A minute or less later, add the water, cayenne, and salt.  Mix it up and bring soup to a boil.  Once at boil lower temperature and simmer on low heat for about 30 minutes.  When the time goes off, swirl the soup around with your mixing utensil of choice, making sure all the bread is broken up.  Take pot off heat and slowly mix in beaten egg, stirring constantly to ensure it does not curdle.  (An alternative option is to add a full egg to the pot and poaching the egg).  Now pour the soup in a serving bowl and present to hungry people!


Question of the day:
What is your favorite type of firework?