Let's talk bathtubs. You can fill them with almost anything: nachos, igloo people, jambalaya. I prefer mayo. Seriously, have you rested in a bathtub full of mayo; it's like sleeping on a cloud.
Yesterday was unproductive. Drank two martinis, one dry and one dirty, and passed out. Oh yeah, I did BBQ a little and kill some chumps on Halo.
Tonight is nerd night. A quick definition of nerd night: Really cool dudes (in an optional team leotard) getting together and programing/brainstorming random shit. By the end of the night, we'll probably have some kind of Asteroid mod where you're a giant cock (instead of spaceship) fighting off Tom Cruise and Oprah's army simultaneously until you ultimately fight the boss which is a Tom/Oprah hydra with high diplomacy. But the real objective of the game is the find your soul mate by fermenting as many eggs (asteroids) as possible and seeing if they explode or not.
Well, that's life for me today. Bye Bye now.
Tuesday, October 26, 2010
Sunday, October 24, 2010
Tit for Tat
Why can't cats get jobs? I mean, it only makes sense. They poop and eat all your toilet paper, so it's only a matter of time till they'll need some money to keep up with that lifestyle.
Let me tell you a little something about Jr. Bacon cheeseburgers. They are delicious and only cost $1 dollar. How can something so yummy and greasy cost so little. Hell, I'd give a cashier my uncle therman's watch for just two of those beautiful, juicy, bite-size baby cakes of meat. I've got a new monetary policy for ya: Jr. Bacon cheesebucks. They might not be as convenient, or quick, as credit cards, but they will leave your recipient with a big smile on their face.
I made a collage today with a friend. Check it. I call the couch with the lady hands and scarecrow feet Dr. Lovestrange Magoo. He's not very good with dogs, but he sure know how to pleasure planes.
Question: What is the funniest sex position name you've ever heard? Mine is the Ottoman or Louisiana Crab Crawler
Well, I'm bob and that's my life.
Let me tell you a little something about Jr. Bacon cheeseburgers. They are delicious and only cost $1 dollar. How can something so yummy and greasy cost so little. Hell, I'd give a cashier my uncle therman's watch for just two of those beautiful, juicy, bite-size baby cakes of meat. I've got a new monetary policy for ya: Jr. Bacon cheesebucks. They might not be as convenient, or quick, as credit cards, but they will leave your recipient with a big smile on their face.
I made a collage today with a friend. Check it. I call the couch with the lady hands and scarecrow feet Dr. Lovestrange Magoo. He's not very good with dogs, but he sure know how to pleasure planes.
Question: What is the funniest sex position name you've ever heard? Mine is the Ottoman or Louisiana Crab Crawler
Well, I'm bob and that's my life.
Saturday, October 23, 2010
First Post
Hello Blogger World, I'm Bob and it's very nice to meet at last. I've heard some good things about ya, and I'm hoping for very strong relationship.
Now that we're past the formalities, let's get down to business.
Today has been very unproductive. I seem not to be able to leave the couch when it's rainy and gloomy outside. Watched the first season of 30 Rock and a film by Pedro Almodóvar, Volver. I've seen many of his films and they never disappoint me. This one was about a two sisters who live in Madrid and are brought together with a death in the family. Once together their family past starts to unravel with a visit from their dead mother. Very interesting movie that shows how well-bonded Spanish families can be when faced with an issue.
So I've got an almost industrial-size deepfryer! And with this deepfryer, I try to deep fry anything my little mind can manifest. This week we had a deep fry party where I deep fried 20 corndogs, 5 Cheetos, 7 mushrooms, 1 hamburger (equipped with lettuce, tomatoes, and cheese between two sesame buns), corn clusters, zucchini, and 2 large pickles. We bought way too many zucchinis and like 7 cans of pineapples. So I've been thinking of different ways of using them. Found a pretty sweet zucchini bread recipe, but don't have a have a grater or any walnuts (or any nuts for that matter, I mean I still have testicle, but not for cooking). It's weird how I got all these crazy kitchen devices, but no grater. What's up with that??! So instead of making the bread, I made a random rice dish with zucchini, tomatoes, parsley, chicken broth, and onions. And like most things that get cooked in this house, it eventually got molded into balls. That's right rice balls. Mmmmm boy. Things just taste better when they are pounded into different geometrical shapes. I'm pretty dang sure of that. Here look for yourself, don't these balls look scrumptious.
Yeah, I'll probably fry them up later tonight. Why you might ask? Because I can and love heartburn.
Well until next time, this has been my life.
Now that we're past the formalities, let's get down to business.
Today has been very unproductive. I seem not to be able to leave the couch when it's rainy and gloomy outside. Watched the first season of 30 Rock and a film by Pedro Almodóvar, Volver. I've seen many of his films and they never disappoint me. This one was about a two sisters who live in Madrid and are brought together with a death in the family. Once together their family past starts to unravel with a visit from their dead mother. Very interesting movie that shows how well-bonded Spanish families can be when faced with an issue.
So I've got an almost industrial-size deepfryer! And with this deepfryer, I try to deep fry anything my little mind can manifest. This week we had a deep fry party where I deep fried 20 corndogs, 5 Cheetos, 7 mushrooms, 1 hamburger (equipped with lettuce, tomatoes, and cheese between two sesame buns), corn clusters, zucchini, and 2 large pickles. We bought way too many zucchinis and like 7 cans of pineapples. So I've been thinking of different ways of using them. Found a pretty sweet zucchini bread recipe, but don't have a have a grater or any walnuts (or any nuts for that matter, I mean I still have testicle, but not for cooking). It's weird how I got all these crazy kitchen devices, but no grater. What's up with that??! So instead of making the bread, I made a random rice dish with zucchini, tomatoes, parsley, chicken broth, and onions. And like most things that get cooked in this house, it eventually got molded into balls. That's right rice balls. Mmmmm boy. Things just taste better when they are pounded into different geometrical shapes. I'm pretty dang sure of that. Here look for yourself, don't these balls look scrumptious.
Yeah, I'll probably fry them up later tonight. Why you might ask? Because I can and love heartburn.
Well until next time, this has been my life.
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